Thoughts and meanderings

I love my job. I love what I do. I have decided I don't like being tired. I have done a delivery in the night every night for the last week. I have worked in the office Monday thru Thursday seeing patients and Friday doing administrivia. I am on call 24/7 as my midwife partner is out of town. I'm tired and I'm tired of calls in the middle of the night. Hum, it is hard to do midwifery care without being available. I'm also tired of not being able to get out of dodge at the drop of a hat. When I'm on call, I need to be able to get to the hospital within 15 minutes. Rarely do I get to do a delivery as soon as I get there - mostly I need to be there to labor sit. My patients are reassured having me there with them insuring that they get to do the things that they want. I'm good with this until I get really tired and then sometimes I get cranky. Mostly, I keep the cranky to myself. Occasionally it creeps out as jaded sarcasm to the answering service or the nurses with whom I work. Alas, I will probably be tired for a while. I'm on call next weekend too.